I was in control of what people thought of me, but I had no control over what they thought of my mother. When I asked my mother, 'How do I tell people about you?' her answer was, 'Tell the truth'. But of course, the truth is never simple.
Interpretation
This quote emphasizes the complexity of truth in relationships, particularly between a child and a parent.
Jeannette Walls reflects on her struggle to convey the essence of her mother while grappling with public perception. She acknowledges that while she can manage how others perceive her, her mother's image is beyond her control, and shares her mother's guidance to 'tell the truth.' However, she also recognizes that the truth is multifaceted and not easily articulated, highlighting the challenges in representing personal and familial truths.
In practice
In a speech about authenticity and honesty during a family gathering.
I hadn’t been paying much attention to things like the sunrise, but that old sun had been coming up anyway. It didn’t really care how I felt, it was going to rise and set regardless of whether I noticed it, and if I was going to enjoy it, that was up to me.
In my opinion, trying to guess what readers want is the wrong approach. You have to tell your story as best you can and as true to yourself as possible. You have to be honest and fair and vulnerable and foolish and brave, and not care what anyone thinks of it.
Some people who've read my story think I had a terrible childhood and that I was neglected or even abused, while others feel that my parents, while certainly flawed, also had truly wonderful qualities. And that's the way it should be, because in real life two people can look at the same president and one will see a hero and the other a villain.
You can't cling to the side your whole life, that one lesson every parent needs to teach a child is "If you don't want to sink, you better figure out how to swim
When people kill themselves, they think they're ending the pain, but all they're doing is passing it on to those they leave behind.
I lived in a world that at any moment could erupt into fire. It was the sort of knowledge that kept you on your toes.
Turn around, and the people you thought you knew might change. Your little boy might now live half a world away. Your beautiful daughter might be sneaking out at night. Your ex-husband might by dying by degrees. This is the reason that dancers learn, early on, how to spot while doing pirouettes: we all want to be able to find the place where we started.
Spend time with people who know how to use their days well. Just as iron sharpens iron, positive people will inspire you to be positive.
Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires.
Friends are generally of the same sex, for when men and women agree, it is only in the conclusions; their reasons are always different.
When you say 'yes' to others, make sure you are not saying 'no' to yourself.
I hold this to be the highest task for a bond between two people: that each protects the solitude of the other.
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