What kills love? Only this: Neglect. Not to see you when you stand before me. Not to think of you in the little things. Not to make the road wide for you, the table spread for you. To choose you out of habit not desire, to pass the flower seller without a thought. To leave the dishes unwashed, the bed unmade, to ignore you in the mornings, make use of you at night. To crave another while pecking your cheek. To say your name without hearing it, to assume it is mine to call.
Interpretation
Neglect is the most destructive force in love, manifesting as disregard and complacency.
This quote by Jeanette Winterson portrays the idea that neglect is the silent killer of love. It emphasizes that love requires attention, care, and intention; when one becomes complacent and fails to nurture their partner, the connection weakens. The absence of thoughtfulness in everyday interactions, both big and small, leads to a slow erosion of affection and intimacy, ultimately jeopardizing the relationship.
In practice
In a relationship counseling session, discussing how neglect can deteriorate love.
What is remembered is not a deed in stone but a metaphor. Meta = above. Pheren = to carry. That which is carried above the literalness of life. A way of thinking that avoids the problems of gravity. The word won't let me down. The single word that can release me from all that unuttered weight.
Reading things that are relevant to the facts of your life is of limited value. The facts are, after all, only the facts, and the yearning passionate part of you will not be met there. That is why reading ourselves as a fiction as well as fact is so liberating. The wider we read the freer we become.
I have a list of titles that I leave at the [library] desk, because they are bound to be written some day, and it's best to be ahead of the queue.
Woolf wanted to say dangerous things in Orlando but she did not want to say them in the missionary position.
In that house, you will find my heart. You must break in, Henri, and get it back for me.' Was she mad? We had been talking figuratively. Her heart was in her body like mine. I tried to explain this to her, but she took my hand and put it against her chest. Feel for yourself.
History is a string full of knots, the best you can do is admire it, and maybe tie it up a bit more. History is a hammock for swinging and a game for playing.
Nothing else wounds so deeply and irreparably. Nothing else robs us of hope so much as being unloved by one we love
As it has been said: Love and a cough cannot be concealed. Even a small cough. Even a small love.
Creating the human race in His own image and continually keeping it in being, God inscribed in the humanity of man and woman the vocation... of love and communion. Love is therefore the fundamental and innate vocation of every human being.
sometimes what you miss the most is the way a loved one made you feel about yourself.
If you love yourself, you love everybody else as you do yourself. As long as you love another person less than you love yourself, you will not really succeed in loving yourself but if you love all alike, including yourself, you will love them as one person and that person is both God and man.
Everyman is thoroughly happy twice in his life, just after he has met his first love, and just after he has left his last one.
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