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She was not good on the phone. She needed the face, the pattern of eyes, nose, trembling mouth... People talking were meant to look at a face, the disastrous cupcake of it, the hide-and-seek of the heart dashing across. With a phone, you said words, but you never watched them go in. You saw them off at the airport but never knew whether there was anyone there to greet them when they got off the plane.
Lorrie Moore
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Interpretation

What this quote means

This quote emphasizes the importance of face-to-face communication over phone conversations, highlighting the nuances of human interaction.

Lorrie Moore's quote reflects on the inadequacy of phone communication, illustrating how important visual cues and expressions are in understanding emotions and intentions. The metaphor of watching words leave like passengers at an airport conveys the sense of loss and disconnection that arises without the presence of a physical connection, suggesting that true communication involves not just words, but the shared experience of presence.

Themes

CommunicationRelationshipsHuman InteractionPresenceEmpathy

In practice

Example use cases

In a speech about the importance of personal connections, this quote can illustrate why face-to-face communication is vital.

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I tried not to think about my life. I did not have any good solid plans for it long-term - no bad plans either, no plans at all - and the lostness of that, compared with the clear ambitions of my friends (marriage, children, law school), sometimes shamed me. Other times in my mind I defended such a condition as morally and intellectually superior - my life was open and ready and free - but that did not make it less lonely.
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No matter that you anticipate a thing; you get so used to it as part of the future that its actuality, its arrival, its force and presence, startles you, takes you by surprise, as would a ghost suddenly appearing in the room wearing familiar perfume and boots.
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When I was in graduate school, I had a teacher who said to me, 'Women writers should marry somebody who thinks writing is cute. Because if they really realised what writing was, they would run a mile.'
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She was unequal to anyone's wistfulness. She had made too little of her life. Its loneliness shamed her like a crime.
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