It is in books, poems, paintings which often give us the confidence to take seriously feelings in ourselves that we might otherwise never have thought to acknowledge.
Alain De BottonRead
.. if you asked most people whether they believed in love or not, they’d probably say they didn’t. Yet that’s not necessarily what they truly think. It’s just the way they defend themselves against what they want. They believe in it, but pretend they don’t until they’re allowed to. Most people would throw away all their cynicism if they could. The majority just never gets the chance.
Interpretation
What this quote means
Many people pretend not to believe in love to protect themselves, even though deep down they truly desire it.
In this quote, Alain De Botton expresses the idea that individuals often mask their belief in love with cynicism as a defense mechanism. People may claim disbelief in love, but this is often a guise to shield themselves from vulnerability and the pain that can come with unfulfilled desires. He suggests that if given the opportunity, most would embrace their longing for love and discard their cynical views.
Themes
LoveCynicismDesireVulnerabilityBelief
In practice
Example use cases
This quote could be shared during a Valentine's Day speech to emphasize the importance of being open to love.
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The more closely we analyze what we consider 'sexy,' the more clearly we will understand that eroticism is the feeling of excitement we experience at finding another human being who shares our values and our sense of the meaning of existence.
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Good books put a finger on emotions that are deeply our own - but that we could never have described on our own.
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The challenge of modern relationships: how to prove more interesting than the other's smartphone.
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It is the most ambitious and driven among us who are the most sorely in need of having our reckless hopes dampened through immersive dousings in the darkness which religions have explored. This is a particular priority for secular Americans, perhaps the most anxious and disappointed people on earth, for their nation infuses them with the most extreme hopes about what they may be able to achieve in their working lives and relationships.
Alain De BottonRead
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