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In theory we understand people, but in practice we can't put up with them, I thought, deal with them for the most part reluctantly and always treat them from our point of view. We should observe and treat people not from our point of view but from all angles, I thought, associate with them in such a way that we can say we associate with them so to speak in a completely unbiased way, which however isn't possible, since we actually are always biased against everybody.
Thomas Bernhard
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Interpretation

What this quote means

The quote reflects on the difference between understanding people in theory and the challenge of accepting them in practice due to inherent biases.

Thomas Bernhard's quote explores the complexity of human relationships, suggesting that while we may intellectually grasp the nature of others, our emotional responses are often colored by our personal biases. He emphasizes the difficulty of truly understanding someone from a neutral standpoint, as our preconceived notions and experiences continuously influence our perceptions and interactions.

Themes

UnderstandingBiasPerceptionRelationshipsTheory

In practice

Example use cases

In a discussion about interpersonal relationships, one might reference this quote to highlight the concept of bias.

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Only when I am by seawater can I truly breathe, to say nothing of my ability to think.
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I would be the unhappiest person imaginable, confronted daily with disastrous works crying out with errors, imprecision, carelessness, amateurishness. I avoided this punishment by destroying them, I thought, and suddenly I took great pleasure in the word destroying.
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We have to keep company with supposedly bad characters if we are to survive and not succumb to mental atrophy. People of good character, so called, are the ones who end up boring us to death.
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Everything is what it is, that's all. If we keep attaching meanings and mysteries to everything we perceive, everything we see that is, and to everything that goes on inside us, we are bound to go crazy sooner or later, I thought.
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Women were like rivers, their banks were unreachable, the night often rang with the cries of the drowned.
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