Labeling and diagnosis is a catastrophic way to communicate. Telling other people what's wrong with them greatly reduces, almost to zero, the probability that we're going to get what we're after.
Marshall B. RosenbergRead
In nonviolent communication, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and requests. Then we may wish to reflect back, paraphrasing what we have understood. We stay with empathy, allowing others the opportunity to fully express themselves before we turn our attention to solutions or requests for relief.
Interpretation
What this quote means
Effective communication is about listening with empathy rather than jumping to solutions.
This quote by Marshall B. Rosenberg emphasizes the importance of nonviolent communication, which prioritizes understanding and empathy in interactions. It suggests that rather than immediately responding with solutions, we should first listen deeply to othersβ observations, feelings, needs, and requests, and reflect back our understanding. This approach fosters a more compassionate dialogue and allows individuals to feel heard and validated before moving on to problem-solving.
Themes
CommunicationEmpathyListeningUnderstandingNonviolent
In practice
Example use cases
While facilitating a workshop on conflict resolution, one might use this quote to illustrate the importance of listening in communication.
More from Marshall B. Rosenberg
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All that has been integrated into NVC has been known for centuries about consciousness, language, communication skills, and use of power that enable us to maintain a perspective of empathy for ourselves and others, even under trying conditions.
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The punitive use of force tends to generate hostility and to reinforce resistance to the very behavior we are seeking.
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Expressing our vulnerability can help resolve conflicts.
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You can't make your kids do anything. All you can do is make them wish they had. And then, they will make you wish you hadn't made them wish they had.
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Similar quotes
There is a silence that matches our best possibilities when we have learned to listen to others. We can master the art of being quiet in order to be able to hear clearly what others are saying. . . . We need to cut off the garbled static of our own preoccupations to give to people who want our quiet attention.
Eugene KennedyRead
I learned to write because I am one of those people who somehow cannot manage the common communications of smiles and gestures, but must use words to get across things that other people would never need to say.
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To the hard of hearing you shout, and for the almost blind you draw large and startling figures.
Flannery O'ConnorRead
A good conversationalist is not one who remembers what was said, but says what someone wants to remember.
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If we were meant to talk more than listen, we would have two mouths and one ear.
Mark TwainRead
I like to listen. I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen.
Ernest HemingwayRead