When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated. This is why we sometimes attack who they are, which is far more hurtful than addressing a behavior or a choice.
Bren BrownRead
We live in a world where most people still subscribe to the belief that shame is a good tool for keeping people in line. Not only is this wrong, but it’s dangerous. Shame is highly correlated with addiction, violence, aggression, depression, eating disorders, and bullying.
Interpretation
Shame is a harmful tool used to control behavior, leading to negative consequences.
In this quote, Brené Brown emphasizes the detrimental effects of using shame as a means of social control. She points out that rather than promoting positive behavior, shame often correlates with various social issues such as addiction and violence, suggesting that relying on shame to manage behavior can result in far-reaching psychological harm.
In practice
In a speech about mental health awareness, you might use this quote to discuss the importance of compassion over shame.
When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated. This is why we sometimes attack who they are, which is far more hurtful than addressing a behavior or a choice.
Perfectionism is a twenty-ton shield that we lug around thinking it will protect us when, in fact, it's the thing that's really preventing us from taking flight.
Social media has given us this idea that we should all have a posse of friends when in reality, if we have one or two really good friends, we are lucky.
What we know matters but who we are matters more.
Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we're supposed to be and embracing who we are.
Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity and change.
There is zero correlation between IQ and emotional empathy... They're controlled by different parts of the brain.
The ego refuses to be distressed by the provocations of reality, to let itself be compelled to suffer. It insists that it cannot be affected by the traumas of the external world; it shows, in fact, that such traumas are no more than occasions for it to gain pleasure.
They don’t need walls and water to keep the prisoners in, not when they’re trapped inside their own heads, incapable of a single cheerful thought. Most go mad within weeks - Lupin
I have never known a patient to portray his parents more negatively than he actually experienced them in childhood but always more positively--because idealization of his parents was essential for his survival.
It used to be that whenever I introduced myself to people and told them I was a psychologist, they would shrink away from me. Because, quite rightly, the impression the American public has of psychologists is, 'You want to know what's wrong with me.'
Many psychoanalysts refused to let me speak at their meetings. They were exceptionally vigorous because I had previously been an analyst and they were very angry at my flying the coop.
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