When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated. This is why we sometimes attack who they are, which is far more hurtful than addressing a behavior or a choice.
Bren BrownRead
The real questions for parents should be: "Are you engaged? Are you paying attention?" If so, plan to make lots of mistakes and bad decisions. Imperfect parenting moments turn into gifts as our children watch us try to figure out what went wrong and how we can do better next time. The mandate is not to be perfect and raise happy children. Perfection doesn't exist, and I've found what makes children happy doesn't always prepare them to be courageous, engaged adults.
Interpretation
What this quote means
Parents should focus on being engaged rather than perfect, as mistakes can lead to valuable lessons for both them and their children.
In this quote, Brené Brown emphasizes the importance of active engagement in parenting over the pursuit of perfection. She suggests that recognizing and embracing mistakes is essential because these moments provide opportunities for children to learn resilience and growth, ultimately preparing them to be courageous and engaged adults. Instead of aiming solely for the happiness of children through perfection, parents should focus on authenticity and the lessons that come from imperfection.
Themes
ParentingEngagementMistakesGrowthImperfectionChildrenHappiness
In practice
Example use cases
In a parenting workshop discussing the importance of engagement.
More from Bren Brown
All quotes →Perfectionism is a twenty-ton shield that we lug around thinking it will protect us when, in fact, it's the thing that's really preventing us from taking flight.
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Social media has given us this idea that we should all have a posse of friends when in reality, if we have one or two really good friends, we are lucky.
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What we know matters but who we are matters more.
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Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we're supposed to be and embracing who we are.
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Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity and change.
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